Monday, September 15, 2008

Exceptional.....

I do not know why i've been stuck to this word "exceptional" right from early this morning; and am puzzled why! Living the past one week in quite the same way everyday, i yearned for an exception, a probable reason that i convinced myself with. Or, yet another word that came in for a particular reason/otherwise that i need'nt pay the centre of my attention,but i am. Or, there is seriously something in store for me. Which ever way i'd look, iam getting an answer, and an answer that i'am satisfied with. Sometimes, our brain does the weirdest possible things.Like right now, i'am not giving it "thinking-space" also!!......Once a friend of mine told me..."sometimes when we begin writing there is no thinking...like our brain has branches and the finger can think" I never thought about such an idea or explanation, but well, even i have experienced this and i'am sure lot of you have as well. How does this actually happen? It feels like talking through fingers. Like the river just flows....

Today, another thing that my brain made me crave for was the color golden and brown. I saw the color of a wall with that combination in a movie I was watching and the actors doing the mixing....my brain's gripped to that one. I felt like touching and feeling the gueey paint. I wanted to fill my senses with the rich gold and the soft blending brown. I dont know how many times have we come across and realised such yearnings. When we dont really do it...it stays right there, and keeps us wondering ..."what do i really want". Maybe it's not a possible or lets say attainable want, but the very realisation of it fills up. Or i know it filled me up. I've read somewhere, "Infinity lies inside the mind". And my remark to that one line is....."Nothing is as true as that". I imagined doing the paint, i imagined smell, i imagined its flow. I felt happy. Do i sound a little off the track? And if yes is the answer, maybe you should just pause and think what just made you yearn. I'am pretty sure that you will come up with a creative satisfaction. The heart, that houses our emotions, that holds on the relationships we make, that cries on a loss, that has so much more than what we really know. It also has a small cottage for us. Our private entry. The universe we have made. The room thats open only for us. Where have stacked those desires and sins.Small bit of happiness is all it takes for the wild flowers to grow in that room. I just discovered my bit of space, and i love the way its built...

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Onam...


Its the day before Onam, Uthradam..... and for the first time after we settled down here in Kerala, we have enough flowers from the garden to make the "pookalam". I say this with pride because "buying" flowers for onam is what's been happening over the years and YEYY!! we didnt!!
Somehow there was a greater deal of satisfaction today. I've always heard my mother tell me,the Onam of her childhood days. How she and her siblings would wake up at crack of dawn and go around for gathering flowers, and this time i was lucky to have experienced that joy! I did the task of gathering and putting them as well!! What one might observe is the magnificent designs that people put. It is indeed magnificent, even i enjoy looking at them. But offlate its just those four colours of yellow,orange,purple and pink. Every house has just them. And i didnt find a fault with that until today :). My "pookalam" has sandal,has cream, has red and yellow!!!
An innocent joy.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Sky.....


I took this picture from Pazhani. I do not know how many of us might have seen this color of sky! Orange, yello, gold,silvers,gray,blue,black...but THIS red??? It seriously surprised me. Long ago when i was a kid i'd seen a cartoon wherein Sun had little angels whose job was to paint the sky during dawn and dusk. And i believe it. Comeon, it gives a sensible explanation, they look like everyday painters!! hehehehe....and looks like that day they took excess red!!! Am baffeled looking at the picture!

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Marudamalai pictures...



The others....

Marudamalai..

This post is mainly pictures....pictures...and pictures... This is a temple in a place called Marudamalai, outskirts of Coimbatore. Hmm...I like it for a fact that its way up in a mountain...and for the number of childhood memories i have relating to it. My cousins and i going in the bus from the foot of the mountain....we would pray....i wonder what did praying mean to me then. I mean, what can a child possibly pray? toys> chocolate? ah! i dont know! anyway, with that over...it was tender coconuts that we feasted on next!
I remember throwing one down because my brother tried drinking from mine or something! This is always quoted to say wat a ferocious child i had been (or still am :) ). I keep thinking, the same stones, the same mountain, the same practically everything, it's seen me as a child...and growing up to this age! Its seen my grandad taking us all. And all those memories came down pouring today, and just like then... I dont know what did i pray...or if I prayed at all!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Dreaming...

Lets talk about dreams today. Off late, i haven't been having dreams that i actually remember, u know, something like a melodrama/a drama/ soap episode. Sigh! I like dreams of that kind, wherein something mysterious/funny/totally romantic happens!! It feels like I'm in the world that i built for myself.( apparently, i can never describe it, sub consciously my dream place is the way i want it to be). The one great thing about having a dream just before i wake up is that i almost remember everything that happened. Even the minuscule details! And, the thing i dislike is that i forget all about it too soon. Funny one though, i had a dream recently that John Abraham came home and he was asking for MY phone number. The very idea sounded brilliant!Why would it not?The person at receiving end was me, and it felt like a royal treat or something!

Apparently that what i like about dreams, it can simply be ANYTHING! I can have my boy-friend as John Abraham, I can go sit in my school rooms and be with my friends, I can go to the Alps for free! So what is that makes us dream? Am not curious to know about it as how scientists may put it, but to know HOW does brain manage to make time to weave those stories up! My mom tells me that she doesn't dream at all!!!! I cannot fathom that situation. I've got so accustomed to dreaming that a dream can make it even in the 5 minutes of nap!! Yup...that's my situation. A dream that i have quite often is my death. I think i have died at least 3/4 times. Each time i die differently though. Something peculiar that i noticed on those mornings i saw the dreams were i could FEEL the pain in my chest. I could feel I was letting go of something. I was leaving something or someone i didn't want to. I was not giving time to say the final adieu. But from the interpretations of dreams, seeing death is a good omen!!! ( its at my risk). Apparently like lot of interpretations about lot of things, this might have happened for the guy who claimed it!

Yet another frequent dream is a wedding dream! Its someone's wedding and i dont like the whole concept, and am trying to yell out and stop and am not able to! And another one is me not finishing my exam, as in i get to roam around wherever i want to during the exam but well i have to submit the papers on time. Obviously i lose time and i get freaked that i have so much to write and just about half and hours time to submit!!! I have been seeing this right from my 10th grade!! This particular one is so worse and so totally adamant that i simply will not wash its hands off me that i saw it 2 days after my college got over!!! :O

I love dreaming....hehehe...like i said... i travel in the world i have created!

Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Pursuit of Happiness.....

I watched this movie last night, and needless to say, yet another movie has entered my favorites. There r a couple of lines that i fell in love with...and one of it is this/close to this... "its always the 'pursuit' of happiness...like happiness is never meant to be attained forever". I dont think anything can be more perfect than that. And like every philosophical guy tells....happiness is just the occasional up's in a life of downs. But well, EVERYBODY lives just for the occasional up's in life. And, on a personal note....i love the risks to get few moments that UP. More interesting is the fact that, even the thought of them brings a me a smile, makes me happy again.......
I dedicate this to my "pursuit of happiness".....to those few moments that i can recollect in my life which still makes me feel happy!

One of the earliest.....when i traveled on air for the first time.
The days i spent playing a game at the terrace of my home, to think of it, i wonder why did it give me so much glee..but its a thing that i still love remembering.
The day our class made it first for the environmental day competition. Our class surpassed the so-called expectations of every teacher and we outdid the much claimed smart students in another class.
The 12th grade camp day at school and the disco that happened for the first time! We had disco lights and HUGE speakers and Neethu, Ashma, Rani, Shaheen, Shaima and I went crazy dancing.
The last school picnic.
My 18th birthday. With my friends in college and coincidentally there was a chaat corner opened for some occasion by the MBA's and lucky for my friends they looted me.
The day my brother came to India to meet all of us after 4 yrs, and he never told me he's making a trip and just turned up in my college. Now, that is truly a day when i laughed and cried together hugging him. That was one of the days i realized how much i actually miss him.
The day my school friends and i met up in Riyadh after a year and a half's time.
Looking through the window of Saudi airlines till Riyadh disappeared from my view.
The day i read " A walk to remember". That book has a record of me finishing in three and half hours. That book is one that i can rightfully claim un-put-down'able and made a difference in a unknowing funny way.
The day I enjoyed the rains in the streets of kalpathy. (p.s. i have a detailed expl on an earlier post.)
The time I spoke to a friend till 2 in the morning and still didn't feel sleepy because of the number of fairies and magical butterflies all around.
The few times I cried watching movies.....like.. Life is beautiful, A walk to remember, The pursuit of happyness, Forrest Gump, Tare zameen par.
The few times i fell in love watching 2 weird and wacky movies... Elizabethtown and The address.
The 2am bike ride my cousin took me. I felt like I ruled the road!
The second last day at college, where all of us went to the swimming pool and yes! enjoyed THAT moment!
The day i got my first job. I trembled with happiness.
The day of final review. When our circuit worked for the first ever time! I cried. I still think it was a miracle that happened that afternoon.
Finally.....TODAY! when my dentist told me in a months time those braces are going to be off!
and...as a treat for the good news he gave me, i found the book that i have been searching never found for the past 3 years! its called... Ancient Promises. Yes! yet another day in my "pursuit of happiness"
I know...its a meager list, and its my memory that fails not happiness!

Monday, June 9, 2008

The trip to an Indian Mall......

Well.. done with my b.tech..and absolutely nothing to do in my native, am on a indefinite vacation! and... i started my journey .. the first being Aamchi Mumbai... Mumbai..., now..this is a city thats fascinated me since i was a child. Everything about it has cought my eyes!! As in... i even like the crowd thats considered to be the biggest trouble. But well.... it was a trip to a mall in new bombay that left me astounded! Now... probably this is my first time to a full fledged mall in India... and.. since i havent been to any here, i didnt have any expectations.. i thought i shud be a decent place... air-conditioned.. lot of shops.. some of them exclusively for window shopping!... blah..blah... anyway... i set off to visit the place..hoping to vatch up with my never ending shopping! my cousin took me there to watch a movie in the cineplex... and..along with that we planned the shopping too...well..we were late for the evening show..and had to wait for the second show....so..okie...lets start looking the whole place...
BHAM!!!.... right at the centre of the mall was a podium.. blaring music of the latest hindi dance numbers.... and..a big crowd to see the show... i hoped to see some cinestar...(hope against hope )... and i pushed through some people... to see??(*^%$ Little kids dancing...they were so confident in doing the steps.... and parents cheering in and taking pictures...ahem... well..iu've seen one of this kind in mall in dubai. okie...something new in this place.. then i see some huge cartoon dressed men.. u know..the kind who r involved in catching the kids attention knid..anyway..some of those in a corner... okie..fine... we went to the top floor ..thats where the movie runs... and... in that floor is the food court too... phew!!! now.. that was what i thought... so many restaurents... exactly like some mall abroad... when did all this happen??? probably being in coimbatore and palakkad for the past 4 yrs... i didnt know the changes in the metro.. hey.. but wait.. madras didnt change like this!! thats another metro .... cochin hasnt changed... but well..possibly change catches hold of mumbai faster!...the flooring..the shops.. the variety in the food court... the interiors! everything was... Nothing like i've seen here... and the crowd!!! ahem...i was ashamed to have had dressed like that!!! but... not quite so either... lot of people dressed in the typical maharashtrian manner were there. like say... their typical bunch of green bangles... the typical clothing etc...and to compensate... i saw ppl in halters..tank tops... real bold clothes...and surprisingly..most of them werent single..or along with the partners... rather..with kids...babies!!!.. again..i was left amazed..okie..okie...calm down...that was the only thing i kept repeating to myself... we got the tickets for the latest Indiana Jones movie...have 2 hrs to spend..and we thought..lets get some shopping done.. and after hopping from one shop to another.. i realised.. only window shopping is possible!!!!
ultimately... i ended up getting to novels... they are the same everywhere...then..left to the food court... ate at the chinese place... it was half past 10 and still the. crowd was alarming!!....
by 1 30 am were we through the movie.. nice one... if it was hopeless flick..i would have enjoyed the seating in the theatre!!! ahh.!! a refreshing treat!
at the end of the day.....i was awe struck at the way the place has changed..and how people are out,... i mean really out for enjoying a saturday night!!