Who in their right sense would try to find a spouse from a site that asks u to pay and register. Errr...how about everyone i know out here. Apart form those "lucky" ones doing/in a love marriage, most of us here r humiliated beyond extent. Maybe they even need to start a section called marriage-hunt-abuse like child abuse/marriage-abuse or whatever legal abuses exist in this planet. Imagine standing for those porn image like pictures u need to take to out up in that profile just so that the person at the other end along with his family just rip u inch by inch. Such a marvellous thing right!
I dont know why I'm made to go through this torture of looking at random men in tamil matrimony. Although Tulu would say that I spent considerable amount of time in that site this saturday morning, it was just to...errr...pass time (pls, understand that everyone has their own crazy moment). I hate rejecting people because they dont look good/are short. But yes, I do. I think its just to prove my point that I'm a human :D I also hate it when the guys cant smile in their pictures. What does it take to smile? Bad teeth?? Or when they say things like "Have maintained excellent academic records throughout". I know this is close to being an interview, but NO I dont care how u "maintained" ur academic records. How do u get that nerve to write stuffs like that, esp in something like a matrimonial profile?? And to think that my father sent that link to me. But, oh well! I cant blame him completely can I. I dont think he has the vaguest idea of getting me hitched with an illiterate. So, it might matter to him. But, yeah there r better ways to prove that u studied well. Like a two hundred thousand dollars for an annual income. That's how u prove MISTER!!!!
For the past 6/7 odd months they r "looking" for guy for me as well. Oh, yes, u pity me dont u! I pity myself as well. I have reasoned one million times as to why i dont need to be married now, but yes evidently it was all thrashed and mocked and reasoned even better by my parents. So, i have agreed that sure, if so many people have been doing this, I can as well! (but do i want to...errr...lets leave that to later). So, lets go to the initial days when this stunt of "looking" started. I actually feared a situation like this, what if the guy comes along soon and im forced to marry!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! Evidently freaked out. But as time went by, and after talking to 2 odd people, i realized its nothing that happens within the blink of an eye-lid. Infact it might take the longest time. HURRAH! I dont have to be worried about anything. Except maybe accept the fact that appa wont let me pursue my higher education just as yet. But well, I dont have to marry, and thats a good sign.
But, it comes with a price tag. I'm made to look at random men and I wonder if he's the one who'll eat the Sambhar i cook post 30 years as well. Ewww, what a thing to imagine.(Ok, kidding!! I have done that just, errr...couple of times). All these times, the process I follow, if i have to look at the person is, I read through the profile and slide my screen towards Tulu and get her feedback as well. Just to confirm my fear she'll be like. "welll .. NAAAAHHHH!!!"/ "WOAH! he's awesome" (and i'll nod my head vigorously)/ "hmm....he's atleast tall"/ "KAVI!!! this is an arranged marriage what do u expect!". I think it's time i accept her point. But wait, we r talking about life and living. Why would i want to live with the opposite pole person? Paul just told the other day that arrange-marriages happen just because men from the upper society/those who r unbelivably/bearably bad couldnt find a girl for themselves. So they r sold based on their job credentials/dad's credentials.
But thinking about Paul's point, I think Im the first person who needs this kind of match making. How else do they expect to see legal grand children???? So, i think i agree with nature's conspiracy
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
This one...ok, does not have a name. Random Ramble probably :)
Its been long. But then, i just noticed that i have started off with this line so many times in my poor little blog. At times I wonder why do I bother punching my keyboard so much to do this blog. I mean, its not like anyone actually misses me in this part of the world (wide web). I mean, i know for a fact that people dont "accidentally" stumble into my blog/read unless i send a mailer (talk about being dirt-cheap)/unless i have my knife on their throat! Yeah. So, lets chuck the part of "been long".
So, apart from all that I'm bugged with life. I'm bugged that I have no-work @ office. Yes, I really am bugged about it. I mean, these days, everyone has that look on their face when u say ur a s/w engineer. "Oh, poor girl, she must be working till mid-night and still get back to work at dawn". But, yes, they should also learn and accept this new fact of being jobless-still-getting-paid-and STILL-in-a-project phase in a s/w engg's life.Yes, I'm truly jobless to the very word. I read Princess Diaries/Blogs/Sleep in the doctors room (I'm glad that head-ache still shows no other symptoms and is easily fake-able). Come on its not easy to fake tooth-ache (esp when u love eating!!), u'd have to stop eating and watch others munching on!! That's a traumatic situation. So, yeah, getting back to my joblessness, i have nothing to do all day.I still work in TCS to use their free gym and meet my friends and u know, generally to spend some time with myself. But looks like I'm getting too much time with myself.
So, in the midst of all of this. I started getting irritated with myself. I realized I'm wasting my time, and u know how i combatted that situation--> By solving Fourier Series and MICA papers and doing essays for applying in Teach for India. Talk about being aimless. I dont know why i had this thirst to solve and learn Fourier Series all over again. I cant imagine the heights I'd have gotten had i felt this in college. Or wait, I think i know to what height I'd have gotten. I'd still be in TCS writing this. Yes! So, thank god i didn't have this urge then and now. I get to spend time usefully atleast!! Who wouldn't be proud of me, willingly trying to learn Mathematics. Then, coming to MICA paper. They were good. I just had to revisit some formula's in Maths and Physics and I knew I could crack them. (yes, I'm beyond optimistic) And then comes my last option. Writing the essay for Teach for India. I got this from Jags, who I know will turn out to be the greatest social-reformer and greatest-alcoholic known in our times. No offense Jags.Yes, I also know deep inside that you will start that tea shop in Himalayas even without my input. (Not that u asked me or anything....nevertheless) as u talk about Political Science to Pesticides to Energy from the Earth to Teaching Children to Making the most wonderful Paneer curry and sipping ur Whiskey. Yes, I'm already proud of u :)
And, on a serious note, I think I finally know what I want in life. I want to teach. I dont know what to teach, but yes, I want to teach. I want to give what I know. I just realized that the happiest moments was when someone understood something i tried to teach them. I felt so nice, I felt I gave a part of me to them. And yes, the invisible hand patted my shoulder. So, I'm considering the switch seriously, which explains the attempt @ Teach for India. They are quite an organization. They have asked for a 2 year commitment, wherein we will need to stay at a rural place in India and teach a class and well, essentially be held responsible for those children. WOW! Talk about challenge! And when they do awesome I get to say, "that's my child who wrote that beautiful poem" WOW! The thought just chilled my spine and gave me goose-bumps :)
I just got to know that Eat Pray Love is released. The movie I have been waiting for is released and I never knew! Heinous crime! AND it's Ms. Roberts in the movie!! I must watch the movie. But yes a spoiler is that, I loved the book. I had a motion picture running when i was reading. And, well, yeah, that's the biggest apprehension.Anyway I'm someone who paid 250 bucks for Dil Bole Hadippa. Hence....
There's another thing which i just observed right now. All of us in the ODC just rush like people who have never seen anything to eat, when some random guy gets sweets. Yes, it could be out of love, but i suspect that it's fear. Fear that the sweet box will be emptied within flash of an eye. Anyway, i ran too. Ok, i waited for full 5 mins, and noticed that the crowd was comparatively less and then RAN!! "Fuck, is any shit left??!!". Yes, that's what i thought. Hehehe, some ego stab anyway! It helps. Its not nice if you always try to prove hard that ur the most perfect one out there, when infact you r close to being as desperate as the manager (for that sweet ie).I also went to the loo, just because my posterior feared the situation of being paralyzed. Lord, where am i! Why am i doing this. But well, what else do i do? And how else will I write this post if i were doing That and not This :)
Smiles and hugs (esp when u see someone like who i saw ;) )
So, apart from all that I'm bugged with life. I'm bugged that I have no-work @ office. Yes, I really am bugged about it. I mean, these days, everyone has that look on their face when u say ur a s/w engineer. "Oh, poor girl, she must be working till mid-night and still get back to work at dawn". But, yes, they should also learn and accept this new fact of being jobless-still-getting-paid-and STILL-in-a-project phase in a s/w engg's life.Yes, I'm truly jobless to the very word. I read Princess Diaries/Blogs/Sleep in the doctors room (I'm glad that head-ache still shows no other symptoms and is easily fake-able). Come on its not easy to fake tooth-ache (esp when u love eating!!), u'd have to stop eating and watch others munching on!! That's a traumatic situation. So, yeah, getting back to my joblessness, i have nothing to do all day.I still work in TCS to use their free gym and meet my friends and u know, generally to spend some time with myself. But looks like I'm getting too much time with myself.
So, in the midst of all of this. I started getting irritated with myself. I realized I'm wasting my time, and u know how i combatted that situation--> By solving Fourier Series and MICA papers and doing essays for applying in Teach for India. Talk about being aimless. I dont know why i had this thirst to solve and learn Fourier Series all over again. I cant imagine the heights I'd have gotten had i felt this in college. Or wait, I think i know to what height I'd have gotten. I'd still be in TCS writing this. Yes! So, thank god i didn't have this urge then and now. I get to spend time usefully atleast!! Who wouldn't be proud of me, willingly trying to learn Mathematics. Then, coming to MICA paper. They were good. I just had to revisit some formula's in Maths and Physics and I knew I could crack them. (yes, I'm beyond optimistic) And then comes my last option. Writing the essay for Teach for India. I got this from Jags, who I know will turn out to be the greatest social-reformer and greatest-alcoholic known in our times. No offense Jags.Yes, I also know deep inside that you will start that tea shop in Himalayas even without my input. (Not that u asked me or anything....nevertheless) as u talk about Political Science to Pesticides to Energy from the Earth to Teaching Children to Making the most wonderful Paneer curry and sipping ur Whiskey. Yes, I'm already proud of u :)
And, on a serious note, I think I finally know what I want in life. I want to teach. I dont know what to teach, but yes, I want to teach. I want to give what I know. I just realized that the happiest moments was when someone understood something i tried to teach them. I felt so nice, I felt I gave a part of me to them. And yes, the invisible hand patted my shoulder. So, I'm considering the switch seriously, which explains the attempt @ Teach for India. They are quite an organization. They have asked for a 2 year commitment, wherein we will need to stay at a rural place in India and teach a class and well, essentially be held responsible for those children. WOW! Talk about challenge! And when they do awesome I get to say, "that's my child who wrote that beautiful poem" WOW! The thought just chilled my spine and gave me goose-bumps :)
I just got to know that Eat Pray Love is released. The movie I have been waiting for is released and I never knew! Heinous crime! AND it's Ms. Roberts in the movie!! I must watch the movie. But yes a spoiler is that, I loved the book. I had a motion picture running when i was reading. And, well, yeah, that's the biggest apprehension.Anyway I'm someone who paid 250 bucks for Dil Bole Hadippa. Hence....
There's another thing which i just observed right now. All of us in the ODC just rush like people who have never seen anything to eat, when some random guy gets sweets. Yes, it could be out of love, but i suspect that it's fear. Fear that the sweet box will be emptied within flash of an eye. Anyway, i ran too. Ok, i waited for full 5 mins, and noticed that the crowd was comparatively less and then RAN!! "Fuck, is any shit left??!!". Yes, that's what i thought. Hehehe, some ego stab anyway! It helps. Its not nice if you always try to prove hard that ur the most perfect one out there, when infact you r close to being as desperate as the manager (for that sweet ie).I also went to the loo, just because my posterior feared the situation of being paralyzed. Lord, where am i! Why am i doing this. But well, what else do i do? And how else will I write this post if i were doing That and not This :)
Smiles and hugs (esp when u see someone like who i saw ;) )
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